Can I Be Real For a Minute?

So I'm a few days late on this, but it just wouldn't be right to let such an important event come and go without a mention on this blog (and by “a mention” I do mean “an unnecessarily long gif-heavy tribute that will probably make your browser freeze if your computer was made before 2006”). So, Monday night marked the return of critically acclaimed reality show the Hills. It also meant that I wouldn't have to spend my 7pm staring blankly at the screen through that shitfest that was the City.

The episode is centred around Lauren's surprise party on a boat (MOTHERFUCKER), because apparently the cool thing to do when you turn 23 is to relive your high school prom, except this time you don't have to hide the vodka in a water bottle and down it before you go in.



Stephanie, being the annoying little shit starter that she is, decided to invite Heidi to the party, which is you know, not going to be awkward at all. Especially when you take into consideration the fact that it's on a fucking boat and assuming you didn't bring a raft there's not exactly an easy way out when shit gets uncomfortable. Obviously, Lauren isn't too happy about this.



Now, with Heidi off at his mortal enemy's birthday party, what is Spencer to do? Not content to sit at home with his retro video games, he decides to have a sort of boys night out. It's been a while since the finale of last season when Spencer got Heidi drunk off her ass and fake married her in Mexico, so you may be wondering if maybe he's changed since then. The answer: no.

Well, the beard is gone but he's still got that serial killer stare down:



He's still kind of a douche:



And he spent his night hitting on an extremely classy bartender. She should consider herself lucky, I mean, who wouldn't want a piece of this hotness?


uck.


So shitstarter Stephanie gets a text form her shitstarter ex about Spencer and immediately tells Heidi. Heidi is shocked:



But Lauren, expressing everyone else's view about this situation, knows it's just more of the same old shit:



Then we're treated with a scene that might as well be lifted from an episode of the OC. First Spencer, borrowing a line from Drea De Matteo, was all like, “come at me bitch.” But he wasn't going to wait, and popped the guy one on the chin and actually drew a little blood. Welcome to the Hills, bitch.



This is where shit gets real. Heidi wants to leave, but can't because as I mention before, they're on a fucking boat. So, searching for comfort over Spencer's asshatery, she turns to the only friend she ever had because she can't seem to keep any, Lauren. Apparently, old habits die hard (or maybe it's just all the booze. Js.).



Laurens reminds Heidi that Spencer is not only a “sucky person,” but also an asshole. Heidi cries about how she misses Lauren's friendship, and how her “favourite memories were here memories with her.” What is actually most remarkable about this scene is that, despite all the tears, no one's make-up is running. I miss the black tears.



Is it weird that at this point I'm sort of shipping Heidi and Lauren? I mean, she did say she was the person she “loved and adored” the most. Okay, maybe it is a little weird.



It all ends with this:



Whoa, hold up. Did Heidi seriously just wipe a tear from Lauren's eye, and then fix her hair? Seriously? That's the kind of thing that in movies is usually followed by a passionate kiss, or by a kid telling their mom to get up out their business. Maybe it's not that weird ... no yeah, it's still weird.

Thus ends my first, and let's face it, probably last Hills recap. I don't know how I feel about the fact that I wasted an evening making a set of gifs of the fucking Hills, and then posting them on this fine blog that no one reads. Plus, based on the second episode that I didn't think was worth mentioning, it's probably all down hill from here.

What [I'm] Turning #10

Busta Rhymes - Number One (feat. T.I. and Akon)

Predictable I know, but I need my T.I. fix before he goes to prison and we don't hear from him for a year and a day. The song really does it for me, and not just because of obvious reasons. I was a little hesitant to listen to this song, because I already have enough Akon plays than I care to admit, but irregardless, Bussa Bus really rips this one [which isn't so surprising, though, I try to pretend Arab Money never happened]. Plus, Cool and Dre do nothing wrong with the production on this song either. Well worth the 30 plays in the last two days (which isn't bad considering my history of overplaying songs).



Low - Breaker

I'm not going to lie, since the days of The O.C., One Tree Hill, and back when I watched Grey's Anatomy and cried during every episode, I've been getting a lot of my independent music choices from TV. This one came of the most recent episode of Skins [Poor Panda. And I don't care what anyone says: EFFIE AND FREDDIE = SHIPPED.] This song has, what are likely the most emo lyrics I have ever heard (granted there aren't that many lyrics to begin with), but that doesn't take away from the epic-ness that is the song that I will likely listen to in my room in the dark when I'm on my period. (PS: I think it's weird that they're kind of old. Just saying.)

I've also turned I'm On A Boat by The Lonely Island boys far too many than I would EVER care to mention... I'm an embarrassment, this I know.

PS: Don't worry ["who's worrying," you ask? I ask that too.], we haven't killed the blog.

OMG OMG OMG OMG

OMG OMG OMG. I HAVE THE TV BOYFRIEND SHAKES.
NO ONE READS THIS BLOG ANYWAY:
I LOVE WILL I LOVE WILL I LOVE WIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL.

He's currently number 2 on my current boyfriend list.
Boyfriend number 1 can still do whatever he likes.

Source

Why Aren't You Watching Pushing Daisies?

Seriously. Why aren't you? There's talk everywhere about whether this show is going to make it through the season or not and I find that disturbing. There are even rumours going around that the producers have been told by ABC to treat episode 13 as a potential series finale. Ratings were up nearly a million last week, but I'm pretty sure this show is still getting beat by Knight Rider and that shit just ain't right.

I'm sure you all know what the show is about. Pie-maker touches dead people and brings them back to life, but only for a minute. Sort of a ridiculous premise, but it works. One complaint I read about the show a lot is that it's just too sweet, but I don't think so. It's funny, smart, and has some genuinely interesting and well developed characters. Plus, it probably has the best set design of any show on primetime right now.

Pushing Daises is a breath of fresh air in primetime, when every hour-long program seems to be some crime show or a medical drama. Sometimes I think this show should have been on cable, where it could have found it's niche and all this ratings drama wouldn't be such a problem. But please guys, if you aren't watching already, give this show a chance (I promise it's better than Top Model). Don't let it get thrown into the pile of great shows that got axed far too soon. This one deserves a full run, and a proper ending.